Max-isms

The wisdom that is my son….

–“Everybody who loves Ninjas, raise your hand!!!”

–*straps an eyemask around his chest like a bandeau top*  *sigh* “Mommy, I just want to be a girl right now….”

–“Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, Ninjas, blah, blah, blah, blah, Nascar, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, Dale Earnhart Jr., blah, blah, blah, blah, Ninjas, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, Ninjas, blah, blah, blah, blah, candy, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, NINJAS!!”

–“Mom!  You shouldn’t be drinking white wine with this!  This is meat, you should have red.”

–“Tell you what Daddy.  You give me money”

Me: Max where are you?

  Max: I’m not doing anything!!

*upon finding max laying strips of toilet paper over a pile of poop in the bathroom*

Me: “What the HECK are you doing?????”

Max: “I leaned over to pull my pants down and the poop flew out of my butt. “

Max: “Mommy I just pooped my pants.”

    Me: “WHAT????!!!”

    Max: “Not for real.  I’m just pretending”

*stuffing shirt with socks*  “Mommy, look I have boobs!”

–“Mommy if you get into a fight with someone, all you have you have to do is work it out”

Max: “Mommy, I feel really sick.”

   Me: “So should we skip your play date?”

   Max: “No thanks”

–“I like tails on fish, but not on people”

–“Mommy today I saw a butterfly sucking on a flower with it’s probiscis”

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